Reason for a Happy New Year

Today was a different day altogether, i went out with with a positive mindset to celebrate the new year and then suddenly found myself searching for a reason to be happy on the New Year's eve. i have anyways not ever got the logic of why we celebrate the year that is going and welcome the new year to come. Hey Hey but my life hasn't changed abit. Its the same as before. Why should i really celebrate the new year.
I saw crowds at the mall and at priya's and most of them seemed to be searching something too. But thier search was different from mine. What they were infact searching was happiness itself and not the reason for happiness. i guess they were right and i was wrong. Who needs a reason to be happy when it is so damn difficult to be just to be happy in the first place. Why do we need to care for a reason, why can't we just be happy. That's all simple plain happy. happy without a reason. Just happy.
You go out and you see people are searching for happiness and realise that life does discriminate between a rich and a poor, a black and a white, an educated and a less educated between you and me. It has opened its arms for one and all. We all, whosoever we are,reach out with all our energy to embrace it for the warmt of happiness it provides. The scene at the public places teaches you this. You see people looking for the happiness. Stealing moments of happiness to fill the void monotony of life and work creates.
I think this is what i have learnt today. "People celebrate new year to be happy and to find the reason to be happy".Hey i m an intelligent guy so what i have done is that i have extended it further. If we can celebrate the new year's eve to be happy why can't we just celebrate the rest of the days too, you see, just to be happy.
Now i know this is typical me. Just learnt the alphabets and dreaming of writing a romeo and juliet.Neways lets get to the point. What is the new year's resolution? I guess it is to celebrate to be plain-simple happy. Lets see how the things turn out coz i am too lazy and forgetful too(but i am intelligent and there is no doubt about that). For now i m hoping for the best.

Why should i

Why in the world should i keep on blogging when i might really have nothing much to say. On days like today i feel my life has become like a river in the plains. It doesnt flow very fast in fact you could feel as if its not moving at all. The problem with steady water is that it starts decaying and i am worried of that is the fate of my life too. That's the point you see, if a river flows, the water is pure and sweet, if it stops flowing, things start decaying. Same is th case with life. Anyways i realise this and am thinking of doing something about it. Just that i don't know what should it be.

Yes she again was too cold today but i never wanted the things to be that way. Its ok if she goes she has to go someday or the other but the sweet memories are too little. What i am truly scared is about the kind of memories she will have for me. I mean like everyone else she will also take me to be a coldhearted selfish a@@#$% when i am not that. All the time she was online i was thinking of what to talk to her and waiting for her to say she has to go. I sensed that she was also thinking about the decay that this pause in the friendship is causing. Seems like too many pauses in my life. I wonder when would it start again. I just hope it starts soon.....

In times Like these

Yes it is in the times like this that i feel more lonely....today was a particularly bad day...its not as if this month was good one..but today the things went all too wrong. I did not apply for yet another company. I am sure people call me a big fool behind my back or may be most of them are now in awe and respect, i don't know but one thing is for sure. I would have called a guy like me a big fool.
Now this was not the only bad thing that happened today, another bad thing was that i did not call mom tonite when i so much wanted to call them. I still remember why i had thought of writing this blog in the first place. It was all because i realised that it is in the times like these when i am so lonely that i feel the need for love and then think about all that i could not get, like that girl who used to come to in evening batch or the other girls who have disappeared. The rest of the times when i do have my loved ones with me i foolishly ignore them or don't express myself. Yes i am fool.
Another bad thing was the way she was acting tonite. Why in the world does she have to be all that nakchada and why in the world can't she understand me. I play games and like others to participate too. Neways i gues i will get past her in some time.

LETS HOPE Tommorow is better.

I m back

back to blogging i guess and this time with refound purpose that seems more constructive and practical. No i am not here to create my magnum opus i am just here to improve. I think a lot of things go on in my mind and i neeed a place to document it or a place where things can be noted and remembered later.
So what do i think, well like everyone else i also think a lot. A constant jabbering that goes into my mind and sometimes i find a few good ideas out of them. Like today i watched this SRK's documentary and this guy is really incredible. He has the ability to inspire you and he sounds so real may be that's because he is speaking the truth or may be he aint who knows what is imporatant is that he has climbed to the pinnacle of his career and that must have required a lot of effort. This also makes me feel more respect for vinkal and whatever he does, he obviously is inspired by SRK and would like to become SRK in some way. May be we all want to be like him. Infact i just thought to myself a few minutes ago that if one can't be like shahrukh khan one should certainly be oneself.
So what else did i think, well a lot may be. Like My Useless Shopped Equipments which i will now call MUSEs and this as of now includes a lot of clothes which i dont wear unless they are too old to wear. I will not promise to myself anything tonight coz i rarely do it but yaa i will try to get a bit organised may be that will help and will be trying to relate to people more. How? well one way seems to be by asking questions about them. lets see how much successful i am at it. Ya ya the table needs to be cleaned clothes need to put in thier right place and i also need to read more and finish motorcycle diaries.

that is it. i am off to sleep in a few minutes and yaa the presentations were good today and i realised its always better to speak slowly. will try to practice it more alas i wont get much time for that.