Lonely Nights

Life, i want to know your reasons.
Why you make yourself so purposeless.
Why you are always so insincere and
can't reciprocate love and care.
Why, you always take and never give,
why when you get it you never use, and
why you render yourself so useless.
Why you feed on sadness and
why you seek misery.
Tell me,why you always have to be a defeatist,
the defeats you secretly savour.
Reasons i want for your indifference and
slumber.
Give me some reasons, for you have
everything i have and i have nothing left anymore.
I am tired, exhausted, lost and purposeless.

As she sleeps besides him,unsatisfied and hurt, she wonders what's worse;
Love that is unrequited or Love that is ungrateful.

And today the talk was of the gifts being given.
Some were happy for the watches and mobile,
some were displaying the new dresses in style.
Some had made choclate cakes and card,
some spoke about the big party in the yard.
Some were basking in the long vacation outside
and there were also the dinners candlelight.

He, the insincere, finally said on being asked,
would it do if i say,
I am making myself more tolerable.

HAPPY DIWALI!

SAD
This Diwali, he promised his daughter a new suit,
his son is waiting for the crackers he will bring,
his wife knows that the will buy the fridge on sunday
and mother is just happy for the diwali to come.

This diwali they have started cleaning early,
they have made space for the pooja in the north
and have bought the lamps and candles from the mall.

This diwali they are all so waiting for it come.
Chips have just upped the last year and
he is now with this new share firm,
the big and swanky office you see
with so many cars below.
He is the new helper there and
they are paying him well too.

This diwali his share firm lost big time.
You know in this thing called F&O,
the clients are not ready to pay they say
and boss it seems has nowhere to go.

This diwali they are closing down the office.
He has just come to know about it
and is still pretty shocked to hear the same.
This diwali it seems there are no bonuses
and therefore the new dress is not there too.
This diwali they might not fire crackers you see
because the electric bill is yet due.

Its not the diwali they are looking for
but its all the present that he can give.


HAPPY
Her first diwali in this new home
and isn't she the laxmi they are going to pray
In-laws waiting for her to dress up
and her husband is just too eager too see.
Guests and relatives arriving to greet the new bahu
and so many people they have to go and see.

She is in limelight again
and this has just been her year.
New home new parents and a new life,
she has embraced all of that
and has given away
her fears and worries
for the new faith in herself.
she is the new bahu in the house
she has become a woman now
she will pick up the threads that bind the house
and she will bind herself into them.

Her first diwali in her home
and isn't the world just celebrating that.

Pick your choice.

A very very happy diwali to the everyone. :-)

On Pets

I have never liked pets you see,
Cats are grumpy and dogs unamusing
parrots are fickle and fishes die soon.

And now you have come,
you look at me with craving of a dog
and are greedy for love and hugs like those cats
you wait for me to come home
see me goodbye everyday when i leave and
you gibber like a parrot when we are together.
Would you also die if i do not feed love for a day,
like a fish, i hate fishes for this.
they have always betrayed me
they can never love me fully well
they never realise how careless i am
Why dont you realise the same
Good you are not a piscean.

god bless YOU

I have reconciled with the circumstances
and i have accepted the situation now.
The memories donot anger me anymore
and the pain has withered away with them.
Severed relations, broken engagements
I have come to terms with all of it.

Though i still look back with a tinge of sorrow
but the gloom and doom are forgotten now.
Though i still pray for you like in the past
but am less of a believer unlike then.

I guess I still see you in my dreams,
or think i do,
coz whenever i wake up,
i realize that i am thinking about you.
You know, most of the times when i am thinking of you,
I end up saying god bless YOU.

Season's Greetings

Pink winters have come again
bringing with them the memories you gave.

Northerlies blowing from north to south,
Air carrying your fragrance,
from your city to mine.

Cold water flowing from the tap
makes the stubble harder now.
You too must have bought new creams
for your soft and pink cheeks.

Darker nights and softer quilts,
warm coffee cups are out again
Winter has come to my city too.

Confusion: A new frontier

Happiness is a shortlived emotion.It comes and goes away. After a while our minds meddle again with the desires which remain unfulfilled. The question once again is, how to live a moment for the rest of our life? Some say we need sadness to understand the importance of the happiness in our lives. But this logic means again that happiness is momentary.

We always search it in something or somebody. Sometimes we get it but then it goes away. And when it goes away it leaves behind memories.Sadness on the other hand lingers on and on. It does not leave us. Its like life is a war between hapiness and sadness. While happiness has its own moments of triumph, sadness normally reigns for a major part.

Have you ever waited for anything so long that you lose out the strength to wait for it. Did it ever occur that the very reason for your existence is not a reason anymore. And have you ever felt that the reasons don't matter to you now. Failures dont disappoint you and you have already forgotten the success.

Have you felt the numbness in your body, the feeling that may be heart is not missing a beat but not beating altogether and you have to touch yourself to realise that you exist.

Browsed through a few blogs today and realised that our feelings are the same, what's different is the time when we feel them. Some have expressed how i am feeling now, they have been through it and much more. Some have fully receovered, some have not.

For all those who have not recovered i am now wondering if i should wish them happiness. As for me, i guess i am too happy with my sadness(or may be numbness).

Read these lines( a girl called shakhi had blogged it)

Har ghunt me peeya hai zahar tune kya kabhi?
Kabhi socha hai tu zinda kyun hai?
Us khanzar se kabhi pyar kiya hai tune,
Jiski chot se tere sine se khoon rista hai?

Log kahte hai mujhe us se pyar na kar,
Par kya kar samjhau unko ki voh bedard sahi,
Par mera yeh kambakth dil to bewafa nahi hai...

Mirror

He was never the best in anything. An average jack of all the trades. He used his skills but not his heart and so lacked the class. He did it all for one thing and attributed another as his reason. He was half hearted and a meek. He was for the first time looking in the mirror.

And all of a sudden he realized, life has been such a waste.

Inspired by JOKER